


Two Turtledoves

by Kikithehousemoose



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Barry isnt actually in this whoops, F/M, Fluff, Fuck/Marry/Kill, Gen, Mutual Pining, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-26 17:29:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17146007
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kikithehousemoose/pseuds/Kikithehousemoose
Summary: Lup pines about Barry to Taako, who recently heard Barry pining about Lup. He gives the best advice he can during a game of Fuck/Marry/Kill.





	Two Turtledoves

**Author's Note:**

> Another work for the Secret Santa!!! It was nice to get back to Blupjeans after so long of not writing it. I'm a lot gayer for Lup than I remember being, but I guess that's how it goes. Happy holidays!

Taako flops down dramatically onto his bed. After however many years at space, you would think they would have been able to take some better bedding from one of the planets, but all they had was this mediocre box wrapped in sheets. He did his best to decorate it, sure, and he and Lup could sleep just about anywhere, but he had to put up a fuss about it to keep up his image.

“What cycle is it, Lu? 39? 42? 64?”

“I’d say we’re only about 20 years into this, Taako.”

Lup was sitting on top of the chest at the end of his bed, facing the mirror above their desk/vanity, braiding and unbraiding her hair absentmindedly. Her freckled shoulders shrugged up and down with the movement, her head turning to face him. “That’s a bit of a stretch for the humans, isn’t it?”

“Ugh, don’t remind me. Remember how they spent two years talking about how they could finally legally drink? They were already legal back home! They could’ve had vodka in a baby bottle and nobody would’ve cared.”

“Didn’t our aunt do that to us with sangria?”

“That’s where ol’ Taako got his 5-star palate, baby. I’ve had high standards from the womb.”

Lup laughs, finishing a braid as she turns her whole body to face him, legs spilling over onto the mattress. She crosses them, her jean shorts flexing, painted bare toes tucking under her thigh. “Wanna play a game?”

“Shoot” Taako says, propping himself up on the headboard, the fabric of his skirt tugging as he straightens out his knees to be in her space.

“Fuck, Marry, Kill”  
“Divin’ right into this, huh?”  
“Merle, Magnus, Davenport.”

Taako snorts. “Too easy. Fuck Magnus because he’s a hunk, marry Capn’port so that I can be a stay-at-home sugar baby while he goes off to sail, kill Merle out of pure survival instinct. He’s a threat to nature.”

Lup laughs again, lightly slapping his ankle. “He’s pretty much the opposite of a threat to nature. Your turn.”

“Don’t remind me. Magnus, Lucretia, Barry.”

“You just had to give me the hard one, didn’t you?” she huffs, thinking, one tongue in her cheek as she does so. “I can’t kill Magnus. But fucking Lucretia just seems…. Wrong.”

“I bet she’s raunchier than all of us. You’ve just gotta step up to the challenge.”

She whistles. “You might be right. Fuck Lucretia, Marry Barry….. Dare Magnus to do something that would get him killed, as long as it’s cool.”

Taako quirks his eyebrows. “Marry Barry, huh?”

Lup shrugs, looking away. “We’re already in the lab together so much, and he’s really funny and sweet. He’s a lot more meticulous than we are, even if he does something on an impulse he has six different backup plans for it.” Lup pats her own stomach. “And that chub he’s got is soft like you’ve never seen. I fell asleep on him on that random gas planet and Taako it was like burrowing into the chest of a bird. I wouldn’t need a pillow if I were married to him.”

When she looks back up, Taako is just staring at her pointedly, nodding his head slowly while an eyebrow is still raised. Lup blushes and throws a pillow at him. “You’re the one who asked.”

“It sounds like you’ve been doing a lot of thinking about this one, Lu.”

Sighing again, she looks down at her ankles, tracing the matching tattoo she had with Taako. She looks back up at him, biting the bottom of her lip. “I just think he’s really special, Taako. He acts like he’s just an average human but I can see that he’s just… so much more than that. Maybe it’s the sleepless nights, but I… I keep wanting to get to know him better. I keep wanting to be special for him the same way he is for me. I keep wanting to do something for him.”

Taako leans forward, putting a hand on top of hers. He couldn’t help but think back to his conversation with Barry on the beach planet, with the poor guy worrying over whether or not he would be cool enough for Lup. If only he could see her now, how much she wanted to impress him. But that wasn’t his secret to tell. Taako was many things, but he wasn’t a snitch.

“Lulu. It’s been 20 years. None of us know how many more we have. All that we know is that we have so much time. If you wanna spend more time with Barry, then just do it. The more you’re together, the more he gets to see how special you are. And if there’s one more person who can properly appreciate you, then shit, that’s good news in my book.”

Lup smiles, sniffing a little. “Thanks Taako.”

He removes his hand, settling it back down over his robe. “That’s what I’m here for. Your go.”

“Merle, Davenport, the rat.”

“Fuck no!”

 


End file.
